Saturday, December 22, 2007

Finding Gratitude


I realized I hardly ever notice what I have to be grateful for -- I’m generally focused on what’s missing, on what I need to get or achieve, on feeling lack instead of fullness. So tonight I will list some of the many things for which I am grateful.

- I’m grateful for the warmth of the little electric heater by my feet; that I am not cold, but warm and cozy even though it’s very, very cold outside.

- I’m grateful for the absolute loyalty and love of my little dog, Max, who follows me everywhere and makes me feel like I have some purpose for being here.

- I’m grateful for my husband and his beautiful guitar playing in the next room. It makes him so happy to play and I love seeing him smile and laugh.

- I’m grateful for the love of my three sons, who love me even after I hurt them deeply by my absence when they were growing up.

- I’m grateful for my friends who have so much faith in me and who encourage me to fulfill my highest potential -- who give me their truth, their love, their time and energy.

- I’m grateful I found the most wonderful photographer, Diane Varner (http://www.dianevarner.com) whose digital photography can bring me to tears of wonder and joy.

- I’m grateful I have the means to eat, to have shelter, to listen to beautiful music, to play with my digital camera and my computer.

- I’m grateful I’ve had all the experiences I’ve had -- the challenges, the imagined suffering and pain, and the opportunity to use these to continue to learn and grow.

- I’m grateful for the time I spent in India at the Rajneesh Ashram and in Oregon at Rajneeshpuram, and for all the amazing people I met and loved, and even those who were the most difficult to be around, for they taught me so very much about myself and my capabilities for forgiveness.

- I’m grateful I found my last spiritual teacher, Gangaji, experiencing THAT in her presence in 1996 and seeing no separation between myself, others, and this planet.

- I’m grateful for my coaching clients, their faith and trust in me and the journey we are on together to create lives of passion and purpose.

- I’m grateful I found the NLP and Coaching Institute of California and Tim and Kris Hallbom -- it changed my life in ways that are still being revealed and rid me of the last vestiges of my attachment to my old stories.

- I’m grateful I have a warm bed to get into now, and great books to cuddle up with as I make my way into delicious sleep.

Friday, December 07, 2007

My story - 6 years ago - Called "Turning 60"

I am living a life today that just seven years ago I considered impossible. But this miracle is one I created for myself – by making new choices, I have made a new life. I hope by sharing my story, others will realize they can do this too.

Right before I turned 60, I felt deeply depressed about my life. Actually, I felt I had no life and realized I had to change my health or die. I had developed Rheumatoid Arthritis at age 36 while living in the religious commune of Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh in Rajneeshpuram, Oregon. I had watched it progress from some intermittent right hand pain to full-blown Rheumatoid Arthritis, eventually claiming my right hand, left hand, neck, jaw, elbows, wrists, knees, ankles and toes. It seemed as if there was virtually no place in my body that wasn’t on fire with a toothache-like pain that was unremitting. With its’ accompanying constant feeling of weakness, depression, and loss of life energy, I began to over identify this illness as who I was. For more than twenty-five years I existed in a living hell, with no real hope of ever emerging again. I tried every known, and many unknown, remedies! All failed me, creating an ever-deepening cycle of despair and hopelessness.

In 1999, I was somehow managing to hold down a full time job at Stanford University, but the disease had progressed to the point where I was unable to walk even half a block, and I was in bed by 6:00PM each evening. On Mother’s Day the year I was 59, I was so sick I had to cancel a visit to my beloved youngest son in Albany, a mere 50-minute drive. I touched a depth of sadness I had never reached before, and had thoughts that death was a preferred alternative to the life I was living.

My dearest friend, Katrina, had been telling me for several years about a nutritionist who had helped cure her of her allergies, but I hadn’t actually been ready to pay money to heal myself; I guess I didn’t feel worthy. I had also tried so many different methods to cure this nasty disease that I no longer believed that there was any cure out there. But now I was morbidly desperate and willing to do anything to feel better so I went to see Dr. Harold Kristal, a Metabolic Nutritionist in San Rafael, CA. After a series of lab tests and psychological assessments, he determined my metabolic type was a “Slow Oxidizer”, and recommended very specific dietary supplements and foods tailored to me. He also told me that sugar was poison for me, something I actually knew because every time I ate sugar-laden foods my joints became very painful. However, I had lapsed into emotional eating as my only real pleasure in life, so I had continued to eat foods that I knew intuitively were bad for me. I began my new dietary regimen immediately upon leaving his office and actually felt better that same day. I was at least 65 pounds overweight at that time, and lost 9 pounds the first week. I finally had energy and could walk more than one block! My joint pain decreased so that I was able to cut my arthritis medicine injections in half. I followed his program religiously and to the letter. Once I began to feel more energy and less pain I knew I could never go back to the old way of eating and living – healthy living is now an absolute requirement for me.

I had to learn all about metabolic nutrition in order to fully accept this program; I had previously failed so many other so-called “diet plans”. I bought Dr. Kristal’s book and proceeded to learn all I could. Once again, necessity and the drive to learn kicked into high gear. I became so knowledgeable, and was so successful in losing weight (50 pounds and counting), increasing my energy level, and ameliorating my arthritis symptoms, my example inspired many friends and acquaintances to go see my nutritionist as well. I learned that I could inspire and motivate people to change, both through example and knowledge of the subject.

Now that I had energy, my Rheumatologist recommended I start doing slow motion, low impact, high intensity strength training, something I never thought I’d be able to do -- the standard gyms and spandex-clad exercisers years younger than me were not at all appealing. However, I wanted to be able to open car doors, reach into cupboards and get plates, get in and out of a bathtub by myself, so I decided to put my objections aside and start the strength training. I was very gratified to discover that this particular type of strength training was done one-on-one with your own trainer, usually in private sessions. The results have been nothing short of amazing, even to my Physical Therapist. Over a span of two years, I went from not being able to walk half a block to walking more than three strenuous miles, leg pressing 340 pounds (more than twice my body weight), and back pressing 140 pounds. I also gained 10% bone mass!

This inspired my husband to learn how to train others in in this method, which in turn led to a mid-life career change for him. Once again I learned the power of inspiration and example in changing lives. We both wanted to share this safe, effective and powerful strength training method with others so we opened Alive! Whole Life Fitness Studio where we specialize in private, one-on-one slow motion, low impact, high intensity strength training we call SafeStrength® . Now, as a Health & Wellness Coach, I want to inspire more people over age 50 to live healthier lifestyles and remain active, productive members of society throughout their lifespan.

I’m also ardent about helping women approaching 60 (and beyond) understand that aging is NOT a disease--this is the most incredible time of our lives. I've been so inspired to help other women like me, I went back to school and became a life coach so I could have the skills to motivate and coach others about the tremendous possibilities available to us. Second Adulthood is a time when we can create passionate lives around our deepest dreams and values, coming alive to create communities of older wise women where our wisdom is shared and we make a difference in the world. I want to coach women who want to age with pride, vigor, passion, commitment, and joy.

Now, instead of being crippled by my arthritis and depression, I have so much energy and excitement about life that I can't stop thinking about the things I want to do.

P.S: It’s 2009 now and I’m 66. Most of this is still true, although my coaching doesn’t specifically focus on Health & Wellness any longer. My husband has developed his own strength training protocol -- SafeStrength®, and started a training program to train trainers in the method.

I’ve done a lot of NLP trainings from which I’ve become certified as an NLP Coach & Health Practitioner, as well as a WealthyMind™ Trainer. My latest certification is in Hypnosis from the NLP Institute of California. I just can’t seem to stop learning! And I love NLP for absolutely changing my life and how I see myself in it.

Thursday, November 29, 2007

Crusader Rabbit and Anti-Aging Potions, Lotions, and Injections

Because my husband’s nickname for me is Bunny, I’ve decided my current moniker is Crusader Rabbit. What’s my crusade you ask -- it’s to debunk all those creepy myths of aging and get us to embrace the process instead of fear it. Ooops, my husband just commented on my new title; he hopes it doesn’t become Rabid Rabbit. I’m sure you’ll let me know if it does. But hey, sometimes it takes a lot of energy and forcefulness to overturn the kind of aging stereotypes we’re subjected to on a daily basis.

I’m sure you’ve noticed those ubiquitous television commercials where women are encouraged (coerced) to use various “anti-aging” potions, lotions, and injections. It’s as if our natural aging process is somehow flawed or a disease that needs curing by our friendly pharmaceutical and cosmetics companies. It reminds me of the old 1960’s menopause myth perpetrated by a male MD who made a natural process, menopause, a disease and, with the help of the drug companies, got millions of women to medicate themselves unnecessarily with a potentially carcinogenic synthetic estrogen. A drug which by the way, was created at the expense and inhumane treatment of ccountless numbers of pregnant mares.

Did you know that innocent animals are subjected to the botulinum toxin that makes up Botox in order to make it safe for us? And that they are injected with Botox at various doses to see what doses paralyze them? If they aren’t paralyzed, then the Botox dose is considered too weak. However, the animals that receive too much Botox become paralyzed to the extent that they suffer horrible deaths from the paralysis of their respiratory muscles. How can we use any product that makes a fellow creature suffer like that? I, for one, will live with my wrinkles -- I’ve earned every one of them!

Now, Botox also works on your face to reduce those pesky wrinkles by paralyzing your facial muscles - hence the robot-like expressionless appearance of the Botoxee’s. Moreover, the treatment is temporary, which means once started if you want to maintain that “permanent pressed” look, you’ll have to continue to inject yourself with the botulinum toxin. Oh, by the way it’s made from the bacteria that causes botulism, a potentially lethal illness that can lead to paralysis and death!

Now, I’m not advocating doing nothing to keep your skin and body beautiful and healthy. I’m advocating doing it naturally and out of LOVE for our bodies rather than fear of “looking old”. By naturally, I mean eating the foods and taking the supplements that nourish our skin from the inside out. So, what are these supplements? According to the December issue of Nutrition Action, the vitamin C in fruits and vegetables and the linoleic acid in foods like nuts, soybeans, and oils may protect the skin from aging. The vitamin C apparently reduced the wrinkled appearance and dry skin usually associated with aging. The linoleic acid helped reduce skin atrophy and dryness.

I use some botanically-based, not tested on animals product (a Swiss formula) from Arbonne International called NutriminC RE to keep my skin as soft and as smooth as nature allows. Their products work extremely well and no animals are harmed, no animal products are used, and no mineral oil either. My only complaint is that they’ve caved in to the “anti-aging” advertising virus and call them anti-aging products.

Now, I do have wrinkles, and so what. They’re a natural part of the aging process. Vive la elder Diva!!

Sunday, November 25, 2007

The "Me First" Principle

I woke up at 5:00AM this morning with these thoughts pouring out of my brain. This could be from an overactive imagination or manna from heaven -- you can decide!

I’m sure most of you’ve been on an airplane at least once, and remember the flight attendant giving you the emergency instructions; the one about in case of loss of oxygen, the parents should place their own oxygen mask first and then put one on their children. Makes sense doesn’t it because the parent first needs to be capable of helping the child.

This not only applies on airplanes, it applies in our every day lives. We are so busy taking care of others, and bringing in the income to support our families, that we forget to first put on our own “oxygen mask” so we are able to help others with theirs.

Now, I can hear the objections already. Some of you may be saying to yourself: It’s selfish to think of myself first. I’m not a good person (wife, mother, grandmother, you name it) if I put my needs before others. Well, consider this. Do your family, friends or business associates deserve a tired, unhealthy, “not present” you who is overwhelmed, burned out and basically exhausted? Or -- do they deserve someone who is healthy, giving, present, energetic, and even FUN? Which person would YOU rather be with?

Also ask yourself, do your loved ones have a role model who shows them how to take care of themselves in mind, body and spirit? Do they have someone who shows then how to serve from a fullness of spirit or one who is cranky, always tired and too busy to spend time with them. You decide because it’s up to you.

We need to take care of ourselves! Show up for ourselves and we’ll be able to show up for others and it will spread. What if everyone showed up full of life, health, vigor and wanting to be of service to one another. This would be a very different world.

Really examine what it is you are putting first in your life and if it’s not your health (body, mind and spirit), your greatest asset, you are shortchanging yourself and those you love and care about. Don’t make your life about quantity -- make it about quality.

Busy is the name of this game. We hear it a lot at our fitness studio -- I was too busy to walk that mile today, or I have to cancel my appointment because I have to work late, or I’ve got a last minute errand to run. As long as we believe we don’t have enough time to take care of ourselves, we’ll behave as if we don’t have the time. Our behavior follows our beliefs -- it’s a law of life. What limiting beliefs are you carrying around with you?



Saturday, November 24, 2007

What is Powerful Aging?

Powerful Aging is the antithesis of anti-aging. It’s not against aging, it’s a mind set of seeing aging as a natural and worthwhile process. It’s a process which brings us wisdom, the courage to finally be who we really are, and the impetus to continue to evolve and serve others and our planet.

I get upset when I see the stereotypical presentation of aging in commercials that show somewhat silly and obviously inept older people. I also decry the commercials that make us want to inject our bodies with foreign substances so we can look younger, and somehow be more acceptable to our peers and those younger than we. There are ways to help our bodies age gracefully, beautifully, and naturally that don’t involve the drug companies.

There are so many ways we can embrace the aging process and make it just one more phase of a fulfilling and enjoyable life.
One of the most important things we can do as we age is to improve our health. Since we replace all the cells in our body every seven years, we continue to have the opportunity to create new and better cells until the day we die. Yes, I said the “d” word. From the moment we draw our first breath, we are on a great journey towards death. What a tremendous opportunity to create a meaningful life! If we remember our time on this earth is limited, we will live as we are meant to live -- with passion, purpose and in service to making the world a better place.

How do we do this? We start by making our bodies stronger through consistent exercise -- if we aren’t already doing so -- by doing both strength training to keep our muscles strong and some aerobic exercise to keep our heart and lungs strong. This will allow us to remain functionally fit throughout our life-span and have a quality of life that’s worth living! Of course, we’ll probably live longer, and we deserve a life where we feel vibrantly alive while we are living.

We look at the foods we put into our bodies for fuel and cell replacement, and if they are lacking, we make better food choices. If our lifestyle needs updating to provide more sleep, we create strategies to get the sleep we need to regenerate. If we have become so busy we’ve forgotten how to make time for friends and family, we make time because it’s in our social interactions that we continue to find a reason for living.

I’ll have more tips for powerful aging in future entries, but now it’s time to get ready for that much needed rejuvenating sleep!

Taru